I just don't get it.

Well, I'm sure most of you have heard about Ted Haggard's little problem. I don't know much about him, except that he was president of the National Assoc. of Evangelicals and pastor of New Life Church in Colorado Springs. Oh, and he's a friend of James Dobson, apparently. Turns out he was paying for sex with a male prostitute, while at the same time campaigning against gay marriage. Little problem, indeed.

Now, I could go on and on about this, but my main problem is that I JUST DON'T GET IT! Maybe it's because I'm a woman and don't understand men and their sex drives. But why does this seem to happen over and over and over again? And if you were an Evengelical leader and saw this happening to the hundreds of other leaders over the years, wouldn't you stop for a minute and think, "oh, if all of these other leaders have gotten caught, maybe I should think twice before calling my favorite male prostitute?" Is the male sex drive that uncontrollable? Is it because of the pressure of being a leader? Is it because while they were growing up in the Evangelical subculture they were sent repressive messages about sex, and therefore it makes it so tempting that they can't resist? Do they really just want to get caught for some reason?

Ironically, I just read an article on ChristianityToday.com about one pastor's struggle with lust. You can read it here. It's a very honest portrayal....and gives me insight into what it's like. But to be honest, maybe I will never totally understand the lure of a few moments of pleasure when you risk losing your job, family, and reputation. I don't want to judge, or be self-righteous about this. I know God's grace will cover the sins of Ted Haggard, just like his grace covers my sins. I pray for his healing and redemption. I'm just trying to understand how one man could risk everything for a few minutes of pleasure....when there are so many who have gone before him and he should know better. And I mourn that these types of scandals are what often define Christianity in the eyes of the world. Sad, indeed.