Marriage at 40

It's supposed to be perfect. We dream about it all of our lives. What dress we'll wear, who will be there, who our bridesmaids will be, what it will be like walking down the aisle. I want everything to be perfect, but seeing that my wedding day is only a month away, I'm coming to the realization that it won't be. I screwed up by inviting too many people. I'm not losing weight (guess what? I don't have a 25-year-old body anymore). I'm not sure I like my wedding gown. I have this fear that the whole day will be a train-wreck. Not exactly what I pictured.

But as my friends reminded me the other night....even if everything goes wrong, on May 8 I will be married to a man I love and want to spend the rest of my life with. How do I know this? Because when I told him this morning about all of my body image issues regarding my wedding day and how I feel so imperfect, he said "But you'll look perfect to me."

I'm marrying this incredible man. Here's what I love about him:
He thinks I'm beautiful.
He makes me think.
He's intelligent.
He has an incredible vocabulary.
He cleans the kitchen.
His hands are always warm.
He wants to grow.
He loves my cat.
He doesn't care that much about material possessions.
He's a wonderful musician.
He encourages me to write and sing.
He's a better writer than I am.

I could go on and on. When it comes down to it, while we dream of perfection, of how everthing will look and feel on our wedding day, maybe we have been dreaming of the wrong things. It's not how we look and how the cake will taste, but it's about two imperfect people committing to one another despite all of our faults and imperfections. It's about having the priveledge of loving someone who God has brought into my life. About getting outside of my self-obsession to give everything I have to him. If I can do that on my wedding day, it will be a perfect day....